Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
