I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
