shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
