Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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