There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
