I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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