direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
