i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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