At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
