Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
