So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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