Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
