I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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