dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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