i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
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