Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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