Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
nutella sex= disaster
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
