She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Randomize