I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
