It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
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