FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
