Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
