This girl is more easily done than said...
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Randomize
