I want to stick my p in your. b.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Randomize
