There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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