: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Where did you get a picture of my penis
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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