Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
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