I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
