he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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