You made me cry and you don't even care
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Randomize
