it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
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