hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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