Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Dick very happy bro
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
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