I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Randomize
