Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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