Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
