no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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