i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
