Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize