Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
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