Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
