is your mom at the bar?
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
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