i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
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