just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I think people are normalizing furries
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Randomize
