I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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