I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I looked at my own cervix.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize