Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
