She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
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