who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
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