im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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