Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
