I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
